The Secret to getting what you want …
Read on to learn the three most important things you need to know when setting goals …
First of all you have to know what you want … and for some people that can be quite challenging! For the purpose of this blog lets assume that you know what you want.
We all know about making our goals SMART – if you don’t, that means they must be specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and have a time frame. Whilst this is a great start there are a couple of key points missing and a new school of thought about setting goals.
If you set a goal you know you can achieve it is really just a task! A goal should really stretch you, it should be something that will make you change your behaviour (for the better of course) in order to be able to achieve it.
Secondly you MUST REALLY WANT IT. Do you think the Wright Bros knew about SMART goals – probably not. But what they did know was they really wanted to be able to fly and they totally believed they could!
It is the desire or the “want” that will keep you dedicated to achieving your goal because it keeps you emotionally connected to it. Without the emotional connection you are doomed!
How many people do you know that have had a goal of losing weight and never achieved it? That’s because most of the time they DON’T REALLY WANT TO, but they think they NEED to! They never achieve it because they don’t want it enough and they also don’t believe that it will happen!
The most important part of goal setting is BELIEVING YOU ALREADY HAVE IT! Let me repeat that – I didn’t just say you have to believe you can achieve it, I said you have to believe you already have it.
You have to live and breathe as if you are already in possession of whatever it is that you want. Who are you with, what are you wearing, what are you doing, how are you behaving, who are you with, where are you? It’s a bit like being an actor in your own film!
I cannot stress that last point enough.
If you’re old school and like to write your goals down on paper make sure they go something like this “I am so happy and grateful that it is my sons 5th birthday, I am 20kg lighter and enjoying playing soccer with him on the back lawn without puffing.”
Here’s another example of a written goal from someone who wants to own a place by the beach. “I am so happy and grateful that I am 45 years old, sitting on the deck of our bach in the sun, watching the waves crashing on the shore.” Got it?
A final point to remember – our brain thinks in pictures. The more realistic the picture you can paint with your words, the better. If a vision board is more your thing then get pictures and photos that make you feel how you want to feel when you’ve achieved your goal. If you want a boat, it might be a picture of your family fishing off the back of the boat, instead of just a picture of the boat itself. Really connect to the feeling of what it is that you want.
So to recap …
- Be clear about what you want
- Make sure you really want it
- Believe you already have it!
Remember … You should enjoy the process of getting what you want! All we actually have is right here and right now so be “present” with whatever is happening in your life.
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a gift that’s why they call it the present.”
Have fun with this!
If you are stuck or feel you would like to be coached through this process please contact me –
this is what I love to do!